My opinions about this are from the position of a fan and a recording engineer.
I am certainly not qualified as a player. (I play drums)
Most of the musicians I hear play, have a common problem of playing to their limit and beyond. They're 'showing off' in a sense, or trying to play the hardest thing they know (and hopefully nailing it).
Even when they 'nail it', something is missing.
When I hear truly beautiful playing of any kind (from classical to punk rok), it's usually someone playing 'technically' well below what they CAN play. The focus is on content, emotion, and tone. If the those are not going to be 'perfect' and sound beautiful, reel back a little bit.
I can sit and listen to a master play scales all day and enjoy it.
It took me many years as a drummer to 'stop' playing so damned much.
Nobody cares how good a drummer I am. They only like to listen to music.
This is not meant to say you're not doing these things, as I truly don't know. If I'm completely 'out to lunch' and you're having a specific tone problem, you can tie me down and jump on my face.
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