Untrue Facts About The Double Bass.

[Richard Prowse]

1) Most double basses are green.

[David McKinney]

2) Yes, it's a cello

[Ken Smith]

If you have one, you know how to play it.

Double Basses are NEVER discussed in the Bull Pit because it is against the written rule.

[Richard Prowse]

Ken, you should have put 3) & 4) by your comments.
5) Shiny varnish allows you to play faster.

[Dave Martin]

6. Double bassists enjoy having their instruments called 'doghouse basses'.

7. Double basses make excellent coffee tables.

[Richard Prowse]

Originally Posted by Dave Martin

6. Double bassists enjoy having their instruments called 'doghouse basses'.
7. Double basses make excellent coffee tables.

Sorry Dave but I'm going to question the validity of No. 7.
I did a gig once and someone rested a can of beer on my bass. One could argue that, for a period, my bass was used as a table. I know it wasn't supporting coffee, but beer can be placed on a coffee table. Can you please think carefully about whether No. 7 should stay? Remember that we're talking untrue facts here.
Thanks.

[Dave Martin]

Originally Posted by Richard Prowse

Sorry Dave but I'm going to question the validity of No. 7.
I did a gig once and someone rested a can of beer on my bass. One could argue that, for a period, my bass was used as a table. I know it wasn't supporting coffee, but beer can be placed on a coffee table. Can you please think carefully about whether No. 7 should stay? Remember that we're talking untrue facts here.
Thanks.

We must distinguish between 'excellent' and workable'. I've put coffee cups on the roof of my car, but my car roof doesn't qualify as 'excellent' because I forgot that it was there and drove away (which cost me not only a cup of coffee, but also a good coffee cup).

[Richard Prowse]

Originally Posted by Dave Martin

We must distinguish between 'excellent' and workable'. I've put coffee cups on the roof of my car, but my car roof doesn't qualify as 'excellent' because I forgot that it was there and drove away (which cost me not only a cup of coffee, but also a good coffee cup).

Good point Dave, but technically your car was temporarily a coffee table, albeit an inefficient outdoors coffee table. The four wheels could easily be taken for four legs, the roof for the flat of the table. Have people ever gathered around your car to chat in a fairly lighthearted way about everyday occurences, while nibbling carrot cake? Dave, please be honest with your answer.

[David McKinney]

8) Originally developed by sephardic shepherds to call the sheep home at sunset

[Richard Prowse]

Originally Posted by David McKinney

8) Originally developed by sephardic shepherds to call the sheep home at sunset

Very good post David. However, will this be point no 7 or 8?
We still need clarification from Dave Martin regarding point no 7.
If the 'coffee table' thing doesn't work out for him, would you be prepared to have your post retitled as no 7?

[David McKinney]

I think 7 is valid: while workable, a double bass makes for a lousy coffee table. Definitely not "excellent".

[Anselm Hauke]

well,this was offered via ebay here last year:

[Dave Martin]

Originally Posted by Anselm Hauke

well,this was offered via ebay here last year:

Though this might be an excellent coffee table, it's a really crappy double bass - it doesn't appear to be able to play in tune...

[Dave Martin]

Originally Posted by Richard Prowse

Good point Dave, but technically your car was temporarily a coffee table, albeit an inefficient outdoors coffee table. The four wheels could easily be taken for four legs, the roof for the flat of the table. Have people ever gathered around your car to chat in a fairly lighthearted way about everyday occurences, while nibbling carrot cake? Dave, please be honest with your answer.

Carrot cake? No. Banana bread? Yep - this morning's guitarist brought some and we ate it before going into the studio... So while the car (like a double bass) COULD be considered as a coffee table, I respectfully submit that it makes a pretty bad coffee table.

[Richard Prowse]

Okay, okay, I don't want to come across as a softy, but I've decided to let no 7 stand. Anselm's 'glass' box is good, but you'd never get your legs under it - not that you can get your legs under most coffee tables. Well, I suppose you can if you're sitting on the floor. Let's move on.

9) Young double basses hang around in groups at shopping malls.

[Oren Hudson]

Grits and more grits. True or not for your DB?

[Richard Prowse]

Originally Posted by Oren Hudson

Grits and more grits. True or not for your DB?

Sorry Oren, I think you wanted The Grits Thread.

10) Double basses have two sound posts - hence the name Double 'Soundpost' Bass.

[Dave Martin]

11. Chicks dig guys who play the double bass.
or
11. A double bass is an excellent birth control device.

Take your pick, Richard, based on your own experience.

[Richard Prowse]

Originally Posted by Dave Martin

11. Chicks did guys who play the double bass.
or
11. A double bass is an excellent birth control device.

Take your pick, Richard, based on your own experience.

I'm assuming you meant 'chicks dig guys'...
Dave, that's not a simple one to answer/decide between. I guess that I have to be honest and admit that I've not been blessed with incredibly good looks and have never been considered a chick magnet. When I play, women seem to enjoy the way I 'cuddle up' to the bass and that seems to make them feel positively about me.
Therefore, I think I'll go with...
11) Chicks dig guys who play the double bass.
Oh, hang on, that means it's not true!
Okay,
11) A double bass is an excellent birth control device.

[Richard Prowse]

12) A double bass has the same strings as a trumpet.