|
#1
|
|||
|
|||
Need a good 'comeback' for..."How do you get that thing..."
We all get the same silly remarks:
1) "How do you get that thing under your chin?" 2) "I betcha now you wished you had taken up the piccolo!" I have a standard two word comeback that I would like to say, but I would prefer a better witty comeback. As for me - I can say "I can get this thing under my chin because I'm a Long-necker." which only works if they know that my last name is 'Longenecker', but I would prefer something better. Sometimes I'm carrying my bass and see someone with a 'wise-ass' look on their face about to say something, so I head them off at the pass by saying something silly like: "Man, I wish I had taken up the piccolo now, because this thing is too hard to get under my chin!" I've seen that comment deflate a few 'wise-guys'. Anyway, anyone have a few good comebacks they could contribute? We all need them! Cheeerz! Dave |
#2
|
||||
|
||||
well..
Dave, how big is that Bass of yours, 7/8 or 4/4?
Gee, I wish I would have gotten a 3/4... I was walking in Philly with a Bass and a girl passing by said with a smile, "I always wanted to play the Cello".. I couldn't talk. Maybe that's why she didn't.. Clueless How do you get that thing under your chin? "Sure buddy, hold still and I'll put it under yours so you can get a better idea". Spear the wise guys' neck.. Speaking of Big, I am thinking of taking out the 4/4 Panormo school bass out this weekend. No low notes that I have seen in the music as I took the Martini last night to rehearsal and didn't touch the C-extension at all except to tune up.. 'A Night in Old Vienna' theme. Um pa pa Um pa pa..and a few runs here and there. We gotta get a few guys together and have a 'Duel of the 4/4s'.. No 7/8ths allowed in to watch without a parent.. |
#3
|
|||
|
|||
Quote:
"Hey, there's a guy with a double bass, that reminds me of how much I've always wanted to play the cello. Even if I didn't get very good, it'd be easier to carry around that that guy's bass. |
#4
|
|||
|
|||
Quote:
Dave, every time you carry your bass around, you are a crusader for the double bass. You are to the double bass what missionaries are to religion. Go forth, brother Dave, and spread the word. |
#5
|
|||
|
|||
Quote:
Seriously, don't be sensitive about it; be proud that you're memorable. |
#6
|
|||
|
|||
Every day, I go around feeling grateful that I don't play the drums. As for those piccolo flute remarks, I usually roll my bass around on one of those ingenious trolley/chair contrapments, and—given that I have the time—I can show the guy in question just exactly how un-cumbersome it is to play the bass! Which, of course, isn't the whole truth (between you and me, that big baby can be quite the burden sometimes! ) but like Richard says, we are the contrabass crusaders.
|
#7
|
|||
|
|||
It'd be worse being a bass guitarist and having everyone think you're playing guitar!
|
#8
|
|||
|
|||
Oh, but I've heard "Mooommy! Look at that big guitar!" quite a few times. I'd say I get a guitar remark for every two cellos.
I remember once, some kid gave me that guitar remark. His mother told him, "It's not a guitar, it's a cello!" She looked at me, a bit embarrassed. "Please excuse him. He doesn't know better." "IN YOUR FACE!", I thought, but didn't say it out loud. |
#9
|
|||
|
|||
The correct answer to that one is "I keep my mouth shut."
Brent |
#10
|
||||
|
||||
"how much does it weigh?"
Quote:
A lot less than you lady! |
#11
|
|||
|
|||
I used to get the big guitar comment all the time. One time there were three of us walking with our basses to a gig when we passed a guitarist going the other way. One of the guys said, "Hey, that's a pretty small double bass you've got there!" Sadly, the guitarist didn't get it, but we were falling over laughing.
I still have no good reply for Dave though, other than something like, "What do you mean?? ... Huh? ... I don't get it..." Or how about, "Wow, that's a really interesting and funny comment and you're the first person in the whole world to ever say that to me!" |
#12
|
|||
|
|||
Chin
Dave:
I was schlepping the Baker into the Orillia Opera House one sunny day. Gordie Tapp, who was on the show, was sunning himself, complete with a reflector on his chin, 80 years old. He said, "Sonny, I hope when you get where you are going, that they ask you to play"! I said that I had heard that line before, he attributed it to Joe Niosi, who was responsible for bringing my bass and Ed Tate's old Kennedy from England to Canada. I believe Joe was boarding a bus at the time, and some ancient woman said this to him. By the way, I'm a grouch, and I usually ignore people who say stupid things. Original lines, yes, I'll stop and talk. cheers, Jack |
#13
|
|||
|
|||
A smallish female bassist friend of mine, upon hearing the query, "Why would a little thing like you want to play a big thing like that?" Her reply, "Because it feels so good between my legs".
|
Tags |
comeback |
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests) | |
|
|